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Mingling with unknown people at parties (Brussels)


My name is Regnier. I am a 37-year-old French-speaking Belgian citizen.

As an accomplished partygoer, I go to the " Brussels Pubcrawl" on Saturday nights. For those who don't know what the Pubcrawl is, let me explain to you:

Pubcrawlers - usually tourists - are met, attended and taken care of by a few guides working for the company who runs the pubcrawl. After bringing people together, the guides bring the tourists to 4 or 5 bars around the city centre. A 10-euro entry fee gives you access to free and discounted drinks. That's the best way to get to meet people from all over the world and having an unforgettable night.

As I rarely have people to go out with at night, I usually get out there because I know that I'll get to know people. Still, going to a place without being accompanied by anybody is always a challenge as I am always afraid of bothering a group of people already talking to each other or at least afraid of acting like an intruder, especially with girls. Having a few good friends of yours going with you makes you more confident but I don't have that chance. A group of friends starting to talk to other people have better chances to stick around to each other than people joining on their own because the group dynamics draw others' attention.

Coming alone when attending this kind of event is a disadvantage but I think that the problem comes from me:

I am a shy and introverted guy by nature but I really feel the need to feel more self-confident, get the attention of people I start talking to, be more relaxed on the dance floor: I need to I wanted to know whether asking questions such as: where are you from, what are you doing, what is your name can be regarded as boring ones when starting a conversation with girls ?? I can start a conversation to them but leave them alone when I see that I don't get more attention from their part. I also drink as less as possible before joining the party as I usually like staying until the end. The most important for me is that girls find it nice talking to me.

Put your mind at rest: I am not criticizing anything or anybody. I would like to get some advice from men and women ;) It would help me a lot.

Kind regards,


Message to the moderator: please feel free to tell me whether the content of this thread is inappropriate or should be removed :)

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