Attraction is the core emotion you want to trigger in your potential partners for having a successful dating life. In order to get a relation started your job is to generate intense burning desire by creating tension. You can do this either by making the object of your desire curious about you, or by being flirty and playful but not 100% clear about what your intentions are. The moment your intentions are clear and set, there is no more mystery, no more tension, things are too easy and easy means boring. The same if you are in a relationship already, you can preserve its functionality by keeping the tension up over a longer time spam.
In one words, tension is the key prerequisite to powerful attraction and the mother of all desires. Tension is born when there is a distance between where you are (reality) and where you want to be. If the space between wanting something and having it disappears, than tension is gone.
Creating the right amount and type of tension in a relationship, involves maintaining a fine balance between preserving a sense of mystery and unpredictability while ensuring your date doesn’t feel totally ignored and disregarded. At the opposite pole you have the situation where you give your date exactly what he/she wants, whenever he/she wants it and this is the sure way in which you will kill the attraction towards you.
For this reason, in the beginning of a relationship, comfort is your worst enemy. If in the early stage of the relationship your partner feels 100% comfortable with you and totally sure on you, chances are the relationship will not be successful!
Have you ever found yourself in a circumstance where because of the complete comfort you felt about the situation, you stopped trying? It may have been an assignment where you knew you couldn’t possibly mess up. It may have been a nice guy/girl that you knew he/she would never leave you. Whatever it was, you didn’t feel motivated to struggle and work hard for something because you were too sure about yourself.
For exactly this reason, when a person is completely happy and comfortable with a situation, he/she will stop trying, in fact he/she may get so used to the situation that boredom will take over the whole early excitement.
To avoid this, you always have to leave a bit of tension, uneasiness, and un-predictability about yourself in the relationship. Your job is to market yourself and built interest and anticipation by letting him/her know how honest, interesting, caring, etc ..you are while posing at the same time some resistance for him/her to gain full access to you. Give your partner pleasure, hope and uncertainty and he/she will want you forever.