Oh God, My Wife Is German
- Recommended Expat Blogs: Germany
- Chad: WorldThruOurEyes
- Andrew: Grounded Traveler
- Kae Lani: A Travel Broad
- Olesya and Jasper: Hmsies
- Aaron and Meghan: Submerged Oaks
- Tiffany: No Ordinary Homestead
- Laurel: Monkeys and Mountains
- Peter: Wiesbaden As A Foreign Language
- Eve: MultiCOOLty
- Jasmine: Expat Relocation
- Ilze: Let the Journey Begin
- Kate: The Lotus Creative
- Meredith: Kaffee und Kuchen
Please tell us a little bit about yourself. Who you are, where you come from, when you moved to Germany, etc.
I am an American expat from Portland, Oregon, now living in Hannover, Germany. I moved here in September of 2012 in order to be with my wife, who is just German as all hell.
When and why did you decide to start blogging about your experiences?
I’ve attempted to maintain one blog or another since 2001. None of them lasted because I just didn’t have the motivation, but this all changed when I met my wife. I thought she was hilarious – whether she meant to be or not – and I made a habit of writing down her more memorable “denglish” quotes. I had no idea I would ever share these things with the world. When it all started, I just thought I was collecting little inside jokes for her and me to laugh about in bed while we farted under the covers. Her quotes soon became the inspiration for the blog and -- much to my surprise -- readers seemed to enjoy them as much as we did. (The quotes, I mean. Not the farts.)
Do you have any favorite blog entries of yours?
You know, I’ve never understood what makes one post more popular than another. Some of my absolute favorite posts have tanked, while weaker ones have gone on to be reblogged and republished in numerous places. But there is one fairly recent post which amused me more than the rest: How to Convince Your Neighbors You Are A Thief and An Alcoholic (In One Simple Gesture) .
Tell us about the ways your new life in Germany differs from that back home. Did you have trouble getting used to the new circumstances? Did you experience culture shock?
For me, the single biggest difference between life back in the States and life as an expat in Germany is boredom. That is to say, boredom no longer exists. Every day is different, especially as I attempt to live using a second language. And as for culture shock, oh my yes, I have a whole blog category relating my experiences in this arena.
Do you think you were fully prepared for what awaited you in Germany? If you could, would you change some decisions/preparations you made?
There is no way anyone can fully prepare for a life change like this. You do the best you can – learning as much of the language, culture and history as possible – then dive in headfirst. Where do you find a job? An apartment? Friends? Forget it; these things will take care of themselves. And no matter if the transition goes smoothly or not, I guarantee you it will be hilarious.
Every expat knows that expat life comes with some hilarious anecdotes and funny experiences. Care to share one with us?
This is precisely what my blog is all about, from my wife’s time in America, to my time here in Germany. One anecdote does come to mind, however, but it has long since been lost in the archives of my blog. I think like 12 people read it at the time. It was called, New York Liaison: A Tale of Love and Projectile Vomiting in the Big Apple.
Which three tips would you like to give future expats before they embark on their new life in Germany?
- Learn the language.
- Bring certified, notarized copies of everything.
- Watch out for bikes.
How is the expat community in Germany? Did you have a hard time finding like-minded people or fellow expats?
The expat community here is great. There are groups meeting up all the time – English-speaking ones, especially. My biggest problem is bothering to go at all. It’s not that I don’t like them; it’s that I’m lazy and awkward. Socializing makes me tired. What I really want to do is watch the latest season of Game of Thrones with my wife, drink a couple of brew doggies and pass out on the couch.
How would you summarize your expat life in Germany in a single, catchy sentence?
“Tearless grief bleeds inwardly.” – Christian Nevell Bovee